DEAR CAREGIVER

I am excited to announce the launch of my new book DEAR CAREGIVER subtitled Reflections for Family Caregivers! Most of the book comes from my blog posts here at this blog site-sometimes in a slightly edited version.  

 

Click on the link below the picture of my book on the right hand side of this page, and it should bring you right to the Xulon order page for my book! You also can phone your order into Xylon at 866-909-Book (2665) during regular business hours.  If you prefer you can also go to Amazon.com and find my book there a few dollars cheaper.  There is also an E-book addition at Amazon.    

 

If you decide to order a copy of my book, it would encourage me greatly if you would send me a message telling me that you did so at my email address which is jesuschild54@hotmail.com You can also leave a comment or two here at the bottom of the blog post.

 

I will end with the words found on the back cover of the book:

 

Family care-giving for a loved one with a serious illness is a very noble and important role. It is also often a challenging and emotionally and physically draining endeavor. DEAR CAREGIVER is a book written to encourage caregivers in this all consuming but vital ministry for which many caregivers feel ill equipped. This book points to the Lord as the caregiver's source of strength. The book further seeks to provide practical and spiritual encouragement to family caregivers who have lovingly taken on a role which they did not anticipate or perhaps desire.

The author is a mother and grandmother, and she was married to her husband, Wayne, for over thirty-nine years. In 2006 Wayne was diagnosed with a serious neurological disease. The author was Wayne's caregiver for four and a half years until his death in early 2011. She knows the heartache and physical and emotional stress of being a caregiver for a loved one. Hence, her passion is to encourage family caregivers in their struggles.

The book starts with a brief synopsis of the author's personal care-giving story followed by over one hundred brief meditations written to encourage current caregivers. The author seeks to stay connected to her readers by relevant examples from her own care-giving experiences in order to drive home messages in the text and to enable the readers to persevere in the challenges of family care-giving. It is the author's desire to facilitate this goal through her willingness to be vulnerable and honest about the feelings and emotions she experienced as a caregiver for her husband. She explores both the blessings and challenges of care-giving and the blessing of drawing closer to the Lord through the experience.

Easter and the Caregiver

(I am re-posting a post I wrote at Easter last year.)

We have just celebrated Easter. What does Easter mean to you, dear Christian caregiver? How does it relate to family care-giving? 

Easter means that the Lord Jesus came to this earth and lived a perfect life for you and me. He later died on the cross to pay the price for our sins, and then He arose again on the third day to prove that He had won over sin and death and Satan. If you and I have accepted his gift of salvation by repentance and faith, we are His child now and for eternity.

Easter also means that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, identifies with your pain and the pain of your loved one, dear caregiver. As you struggle to help your loved one who is perhaps fighting against an incurable disease, He identifies with you. Having suffered the worst possible pain for us on the cross He is able to sympathize with our heartaches and weaknesses. He is also an all powerful Savior to whom we can freely go for grace in our moments of sadness and overwhelming and crushing needs.  Check out Hebrews 4:15-16 in the New Testament.

Because of Easter and Christ's sacrifice you can freely approach God the Father Himself with your and your loved one's needs, dear Christian caregiver. You can cry out to Him for help and call Him your “Abba Father,” because He considers you His special child. (Romans 8:15) Easter also means that when your heart is so weighed down with the heartaches and overwhelming circumstances of family care-giving that you do not even know how to pray, the Holy Spirit will intercede and pray for you! (Romans 8:26)

Easter for the caregiver means that although you will always face trials and troubles in this world, the Lord Jesus Christ has overcome the world.  He is also your source of peace even in the most challenging of times. (John 16:33)  Even in the overwhelming circumstances of family care-giving, even when we do not understand God's ways in allowing certain things in our lives, and even in the most unthinkable circumstances God is working for our ultimate good. We are victors in Him! (Romans 8:28)

Dear Christian caregiver, my hope for you would be that your loved one is healed on this earth. Whether he or she is healed on this earth or not, however, a child of God is whole and perfect upon entering heaven. No matter what happens in your care-giving situation you too, dear caregiver, will slowly heal emotionally and spiritually. God will always be with you, and joy will return one day. His love for you will never fail. He proved that love for you on the cross. That is the meaning of Easter for the caregiver and for all of us.

Your Will Be Done, Lord

(I was prompted to write this post after reading a couple devotionals that fueled my thinking and touched my spirit.)

As I mentioned in my last post both my husband and I had serious illnesses which overlapped somewhat during the same time frame. I will be a seven year survivor of breast cancer in July of this year. My husband, however, passed away from his disease in early 2011.

There have been times when I asked myself why I am alive and thriving today, and my husband was taken. My disease could be treated, but my husband's neurological disease had no cure. Yet God can do anything. He could have healed my husband as well. I think I have subconsciously wondered also, if I prayed enough for his healing. Did I do enough? Was I enough? Yet was this not flawed thinking on my part?

Many Christians believe God will heal all diseases, if they have enough faith.  But is this kind of faith not a faith in the greatness of one's own faith rather than a faith in God?  Is it not also a faith in a desired outcome rather than a faith in God who should be the object of our faith?  Is this kind of faith centered in God's plan and will?  God WILL ultimately heal all our diseases in eternity. It is not always His plan to heal us on earth, however. That was not His plan for my husband, Wayne. It was God's plan to take Wayne home to Himself. Would I and can I be submissive to God's best for both Wayne and I?

Dear caregiver, God may choose to heal your loved one on this earth. He also may choose to take your loved one to Himself in His perfect timing. You probably do not even want to consider that possibility. I certainly did not want to contemplate losing my husband. Yet there is peace in resting in His will. There is peace in being submissive to His plan.

Are you willing to make this your prayer, dear caregiver, “Lord give me a willing heart to embrace Your perfect plan whatever that be, Lord. Help me to trust that You will provide the strength to submit to Your perfect plan and purpose. Use me, Lord, to be an instrument in Your hand no matter what path You lead me down or no matter what purpose You have planned for my life. Lord, I pray for the healing of my loved one, and I would be so grateful if he is healed. Yet Lord, Your will be done."

Walk with Joy the Caregiver Walk

My husband was diagnosed with his neurological disease in 2006. In 2007 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. After eight months of treatment for my breast cancer in 2007 and 2008, in a few months I will be a seven year breast cancer survivor. On October 4, 2008 I was celebrating my last treatment for breast cancer. Following are some of the words I wrote in a post at another blog site at that time:

“Recently I was looking at a lovely daffodil flower sitting in a vase on my window sill. This was given to me one day by a nurse at the cancer clinic after I completed one of my radiation treatments. This flower reminded me of the kindness and care given to me by my doctors and nurses these past months. My eyes also landed on a beautiful azalea plant sitting on my coffee table. This plant was given to me by a special person in our church. This azalea plant was symbolic to me of the tremendous love and concern which has been shown to Wayne, my husband, and me in these past many months by our church family. Today I look at a beautiful bouquet of spring flowers sitting on my kitchen table given to me by my son's family. These flowers remind me of the love of my earthly family.

As of this morning my radiation treatments for breast cancer are complete!!! It has been a long journey-this cancer journey beginning in July of 2007. It has involved chemo, a mastectomy, and the last few weeks radiation. Wayne, my husband, was diagnosed with a serious neurological disease about a year earlier in 2006. It has been a challenging couple of years to say the least, but there also have been many blessings along the way. It has been a time to draw closer to the Lord in more dependence on Him. It has been a time to hear the Lord speaking through His promises in His Holy Word in a new and wonderful way. Even when the doubts or discouragement comes it is good to know we have such a faithful God. It has also been a time to experience the love of God's people and our earthly family in such a rich and abundant way. They have in many ways made our trial "a place of springs" in the midst of "Valley of Baca" (Psalm 84:6)

I will not have any more cancer treatments now that the radiation treatments are complete except for seeing my doctor and having blood tests once every three months. I will have some discomfort and/or redness yet for up to a month from the radiation. Also the "odds" are relatively high that the cancer could reoccur within the next five years, but we know our lives are not about "odds" but the certainties of God's Word. Pray that there will not be a recurrence of cancer. Continue to pray also for my husband, Wayne, that his condition will not continue to deteriorate. Most importantly, pray that my husband and I will live every day in the joy of the Lord and for His glory."


Such were my words on that day in early April of 2008.  As I said before I am a cancer survivor.  In fact, I am well past the five year mark.  My husband however, passed away as a result of his disease in early 2011. The years after my cancer treatment were completed were increasingly difficult for my husband and I, as my husband continued to deteriorate in his health. Those years were sometimes overwhelmingly difficult physically and emotionally for me as my husband's caregiver.

Yet these circumstances did not change who I was and am in Christ. In fact, they drew and continue to draw me closer to the Lord. May it be your prayer as well as mine, dear caregiver, that we will accept with open arms whatever God allows in our lives; if it brings glory to our Lord. May it be your prayer, dear caregiver, that you will walk with joy, peace, and freedom; as you walk the difficult care-giving road. I end today with a link below to a song that I placed at the end of that blog post in April of 2008. May it be always be my prayer. May it be your prayer as well, dear caregiver.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=e8HgAVenbUU