I pray that you will bear with me, as I share some of thoughts concerning my sister's homegoing to Heaven on February 13th. I tend to process grief and my faith thoughts through writing. In my family, as most of you know, I had a sister who valiently fought her cancer for over three years
Nancy not only valiently fought the cancer, but she was a wonderful testimony the entire time to her love for the Lord and her belief in His goodness. She kept the faith even when she was enduring intense pain, She was a wonderful example of patience and trust in the Lord to her children, grandchildren, and siblings. So was and is Milo, her husband, who was a faithful husband and caregiver to Nancy those years that she was fighting cancer. Her entire marriage to her husband, Milo, was a walk of faithfulness to the Lord. Milo and Nancy also loved their music ministry behind prison walls. Many prison inmates further learned to love them, their music, and their Lord.
Above is a song that my sister, Nancy, and her husband, Milo, sang about their walk of faith that we just talked about. I first posted this song more than two years ago. Recently I ran across this song that they sang again. It can be found on Youtube. The name of the song is "Shoulders." Listen to the song above, and be blessed and encouraged. It talks about their trust in the Lord to carry them on His shoulders through the struggles.
The struggles were indeed difficult for them at the time that they sang the song. Those trials became even more intense as the days and years progressed throughout Nancy's disease. Yet God did carry them both on His shoulders the whole time, And now I picture Nancy cuddled in the Lord's arms and singing her heart out with the saints in heaven.
Nancy and I had some wonderful faith talks in the last years. In the last days I have thought that it would be so wonderful, if Nancy and I could talk one more time. I would say to her, "Tell me, what is Heaven like?" I imagine she would say that is is much more wonderful than she can share with me, and that I need to just walk by faith until my day arrives to go home to Heaven to be with Jesus and all the saints.
There are many of you readers who may be going through some deep trials. Some of you are going through cancer or other serious illnesses. Others of you may be caregivers for a love one who is sick. This too is a difficult path to tread. Some of you may be suffering financial issues or family break-up. Perhaps there is another trial you are enduring.
If you are a child of God, however, you know that the Lord is with you and even carrying you through it all. He carries us through weakness, sickness, and brokenness. He carries us on His shoulders like a Daddy might carry a young child who is weak and weary. Your help comes from the Lord.
Sometimes when the trials are overwhelming and many, it is difficult to see that the Lord is with us and helping us. At those moments we must learn to not listen to our emotions which don't always tell us the truth. We need to listen instead to the truth of God's Word which promises that the Lord is always our help and will never forsake us. We don't always have to see it immediately to believe it, because it is true that God is with us. Our help comes from Him in His perfect timing!
If you have not already done so, listen to the song above, and be blessed and encouraged.
(Forgive me for once again republishing a post from the past in a slightly edited version. I think it is a message worth repeating again, as Tuesday will be Valentine's Day.)
Dear caregiver, do you ever feel the sorrow of things lost? Do you ever miss the way things were in the past with your loved one for whom you are caring? Does the approach of holidays such as Valentine's day make you feel melancholy and sad? Or perhaps did your loved one pass on to Eternity? Even though new love has entered my life, I remember those feelings.
During those moments of sadness remember that the Lord loves you with an infinite love. He in effect is your Divine Valentine. He is sufficient. He alone can give you all that you need. Below is a poem called Your Divine Valentine:
Your Divine Valentine
A Valentine may play a love song for you, but God sings you the sweetest love song in the universe. (Zephaniah 3:17)
A Valentine may give you flowers, but God sent you the most beautiful rose of all, Jesus. (Song of Solomon 2:1)
A Valentine may bring you chocolate, but God provides you with something even sweeter, His Word. (Psalm 119:103)
A Valentine may love you for a lifetime,but God loved you before you were born and will love you for all eternity, (Jeremiah 31:3)
If you are caring for a loved one or friend, some day that will end. It may end with your loved one being cured, It may also end in the death of your loved one. In that eventuality, you will then have to begin the process of picking up the pieces of your life and finding new purpose in your life. This is something we do not wish to talk about, but it is often a part of the care-giving process. Hence, we need to discuss it.
Today I am posting a link to an article that was published in Guideposts magazine over seven years ago about my experiences the first months after my husband's death. I had cared for him for over four and a half years, and that time period was a huge transition for me. This article documents my journey to finding purpose in my life again. It is written in first person, but was actually written by a Guideposts author (even though I am a published author myself) after an extensive hour and a half interview with me. I also suggested changes and had input in the final copy. Although I would have changed the wording a few places, it certainly reflects my emotions and feelings at the time. Click on the link below to read it.
A few years ago I read a book called NOT God Enough by JD Greer. The premise of the book is that our understanding of God affects everything in our life. The author also contends that in our minds we often do not see God in all of His greatness. We often do not see how big is God. We do not remember that His thoughts and ways are not like our thoughts and ways.
Following is an excerpt from that book, "What we think about God determines everything else in our lives; what we value, what we pursue, and how we pursue it. Our vision of God also determines whether our beliefs will make it through the inevitable storms of doubt, temptation, and suffering that life brings. The real God is not a god who simply completes us and makes us feel sentimental during worship; He is a God who humbles us and transforms us from the inside out."
It is so easy to question God or become weary when difficult times come in our lives. I remember times like these when caring for my first husband and after his death. I remember times like this when I have had to tread life's path and face day to day problems alone as a widow. I remember times like that since those days as well. Yet if we remember what a great God we serve, we can trust God in these times. He is using these times in our lives to transform us and humble us. This in turn makes us more useful servants for Him and also eventually adds more joy to our lives. I think this also adds gratitude to our lives for even the little blessings. I know it has for me.
Even in what we consider "good" things in our lives, our vision of God determines how we use these gifts and in how we enjoy these gifts. It is also a walk of faith, as we sometimes walk in new and good life-changing directions in our lives. Walking life with joy even in "good" times requires trusting our great God especially when we can't see for sure what is around the next corner. It is trusting our great and loving God to lead step by step. It involves trusting that our great and awesome God knows what He is doing. What is your and my vision of God?
If we truly look at God's world and the things He does in our world, we know that God lives and is good. Such were the sentiments expressed by a pastor who preached in our church a couple weeks ago. Sometimes we get so bogged down with trials and challenges that we lose sight of the infinite goodnesss of God. We sometimes miss or take for granted His wonders and gifts all around us.
Do we ever stop to contemplate the wonders of His creation: the sun and moon and stars? Do we thank Him for the beauty of a sunrise and sunset and for the provision of rain and the pure white snow to water the earth? Do we thank Him for the flowers in thier season? Do we think about our ability to breathe and the functioning of our bodily organs? Do we stand in awe of all God's daily provinces to us?
I think of a child who so often becomes so animated and excited, as he or she discovers new things in God's creation. Psalm 8:1-3a says, "Oh Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set Your glory above the heavens. From the lips of children and infants You have ordained praise." We also as adults need to delight in these gifts that God gives us. More importantly we need to delight in Him who gives us these gifts to enjoy. We also need to throw away or at least not make so important the worthless and unimportant things in our lives. God must be supreme in our lives, and He must be our chief delight.
God is good when He shows His wonders and care for us in creation and in His daily blessings for us. Psalm 8:4 says, "what is man that You care for him, that you are mindful of him?" As humans we are but specks in the vastness of God's universe. Yet God delights in us and cares for us. In fact, He created us to show His glorious purpose of showing His unlimited and awesome care for us.
If God is so good what will He not do for us? He not only gives us daily blessings, but He gave His Son, Jesus, as a sacrifice for sin. If we are a child of God, we now live by grace and faith alone and not by our polluted works. Will He also not then ultimately deliver us from this world of woe and trouble? He promises us that He will do that very thing! He promises us that He is preparing a place for us right now in His Heavenly kingdom!
All these blessings should never be taken for granted. God refuses to be worshipped abstractly. He wants to be worshipped personally and with love. God never wants Himself or His blessings to be taken for granted. Thinking about God and all His blessings should cause us to be patient in adversity, thankful in the blessings, and confident about the future. It should also make us repentent of relying on anything but the Lord for our security and guidence.
One of my favorite passages in the Bible is Psalm 73:21-26. After lamenting earlier in the Psalm about difficult situations all around him, the psalmist in this passage finally comes into the presence of God (verses 16-17) When coming into the presence of the Lord, he gains a new perspective. He begins to see things from God's perspective.
The psalmist begins to see that God never gets away from us. He is our security (verses 23-26). He is all we need or want both on earth and in heaven. He is our portion forever (verses 25-26). We need to begin to seek intimacy with Him now here on earth (verse 28). What is even better, Eternity is ahead of us when all our wounds will be healed and our questions will be answered. He alone is our ultimate source of peace and joy. Let's rejoice in that glorious truth.
Here are the beautiful words of Psalm 73:21-26. Revel in the wonder of the words when you are feeling overwhelmed by life circumstances:
21 When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, 22 I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you.
23 Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. 24 You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. 25 Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. 26 My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
Spiritual muscles like physical muscles can only grow through pain. Physical muscles grow when pushed beyond their capacity and actually break down. They then rebuild stronger and bigger. The same is true of spiritual muscles. If we want to grow spiritually we must at times go through trials and circumstances that are painful or at least challenging.
As I have mentioned before in previous posts, I went through the challenges of caring for my first husband and losing him to death, now a little over twelve years ago. I have gone through other deep challenges and trials as well since that day. Yet I have grown through those experiences. My love for the Lord and trust in Him has expanded greatly through these experiences. New experiences as well, be they pleasant or difficut, mean leaving the old behind and moving forward to the new. They involve a certain element of trust. They involve stretching one's spiritual muscles.
In The One Year Book of Hope by Nancy Guthrie says this: "I don't want my greatest spiritual adventures to be all behind me! I want to keep going, keep growing. I want to know Him better and love Him better and love Him more next year than I do today. I want to be like Him and do more for Him. So I got to keep building my spiritual muscles."
Whether you are caring for a loved one who is ill or have recently lost such a loved one, whether a family member is going through very difficult times, whether there is a host of other difficult circumstances in your life, or whether you are just starting an exciting new adventure in your life; trust God to see your through it all. Trust that God will stretch your spiritual muscles, and be willing to let Him do so in your life. It will not only increase your strength in this life, but it will also reap benefits in Eternity!
