Remembering

At times, the heartaches of care-giving can cause caregivers to temporarily forget the memories of the good times that they have experienced with their loved ones before they became ill. Caregivers can become so consumed with the challenges of fighting the declines in health evident in their loved ones that the good relationships and past good memories of their interactions with their loved ones get pushed to the back of their minds. 

     

At one point during my husband’s illness, I retrieved from their storage space our old love letters that we had sent to each other while dating. I spent an enjoyable period of time that day rereading those letters. It was so refreshing and a real spirit lifter. It helped to give me some perspective on things that day.  

    

After my husband’s death, I reminisced about special memories of our lives together. I recalled some special trips we had taken. I thought about how I enjoyed hiking trails with him from time to time before he became ill. I remembered our excitement over the birth of our children and grandchildren. I also thought about what I had loved and admired about him.  

     

Dear Christian caregiver, perhaps your loved one’s illness prevents you from doing some of the things you at one time loved doing together. Perhaps the illness has changed your loved one’s personality and quality of interactions with you. Perhaps, however, remembering those good times and thinking about what you always loved and admired about your loved one would help you to get through the very challenging days of care-giving.

Below is some of my memories.  The first picture is of my husband, Wayne, and I when we were dating.  The second one is of our wedding in July of 1971.  The third one is of Wayne and I with our three sons when they were very young.  The last picture is of Wayne and I at our youngest son's wedding about a year before Wayne was diagnosed with his disease.

When I look at some of the pictures of Wayne shortly before he passed away I can feel sad.  But these pictures bring fond memories and joy to my heart. Concentrate on the happy memories and the blessings, dear caregiver.