Has life been difficult for you lately, dear reader? Do you feel constantly challenged by family caregiving issues, financial issues, or other trials? Have you even perhaps been burdened with a certain heartache for years on end? I found these two encouraging pictures posted on Facebook a couple years ago. This is a short post, but a simple picture can convey much truth. I hope you will be blessed and helped, as you view these pictures.
(This is a chapter in my book, Dear Caregiver Reflections for Family Caregivers.
Satan loves to try to discourage us and rob us of our joy as believers. Satan can never snatch us out of the hand of our Lord God, for we are safe in the hands of the Lord forever. So Satan tries to do the next best thing in his eyes. Satan tries to rob us of our joy and effectiveness as Christians.
As a caregiver, it is so easy to become discouraged. The heartaches of seeing one’s loved one suffer and deteriorate in his or her body can be very overwhelming. Even the psalmists in the book of Psalms in the Old Testament often expressed feelings of discouragement. In some cases they were experiencing deep trials in spite of their present faithfulness to the Lord God. Hence, they sometimes felt abandoned, crushed, and devalued by God.
One strategy for fighting discouragement demonstrated in the Psalms is prayer. Prayer should be our first recourse for help, deliverance, and restoration in times of trouble and challenge. Prayer should also be our first recourse in fighting the discouragement which sometimes accompanies difficult times. Through the avenue of prayer we can gain peace, joy, and relief from discouragement in facing life’s challenges.
Another strategy for fighting Satan’s attempts to discourage us is a firm confidence in the Lord’s directing and unfailing love, kindness, and faithfulness. We must also pray with the psalmists of old for the Lord God’s guiding and directing light and truth on our paths throughout this life. If we saturate our lives with prayer and the truths of God’s Word, we will have the confidence of the Lord’s presence in our lives. We will also have His joy in full and a song in our hearts (Psalm 42:8).
Remembering and praising God for His past mercies among His people and in our own personal lives is another great way to fight Satan’s attempts to discourage us. A powerful deterrent to discouragement in present trials and in future challenges is remembering how the Lord God has helped us in the past (Psalm 77:11-12).
Yet another strategy for fighting discouragement is God-directed self-talk (Psalm 42:5 & 11 & Psalm 43:5). Saturating one’s mind with God’s Holy Word and then verbally reminding oneself of the awesome truths and promises of God’s Holy Word is one of the best prescriptions against Satan’s discouraging lies.
One final strategy in fighting discouragement is to vow to praise God during our trials and in excited anticipation of the Lord’s answers to our prayers and wonders in our lives (Psalm 43:4). May the Lord God’s song and joy (not Satan’s discouraging lies) reside in you, dear caregiver, and in all of us!
If this blog post was a blessing to you, you can order my book, Dear Caregiver Reflections for Family Caregivers. It can be ordered on Amazon here: https://www.amazon.com/Dear-Caregiver-Sharon-Vander-Waal/dp/1629524263/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1482027543&sr=1-1&keywords=Dear+Caregiver You can also order it directly from me by contacting me at jesuschild54@hotmail.com Consider ordering it for yourself or someone you love.
This past Friday on March fourth it was five years ago since my Mom passed away. This was a few days after having suffered a severe stroke. I was with my Mom the last few minutes of her life. It was a sad but wonderful experience. That day it felt like I was given the honor of ushering my Mom into Heaven.
A few days after my Mom's death five years ago I wrote about my experiences the day of her death and the days following in my weekly blog post. In that blog post I talked about Eternity and also care-giving for a loved one. Bear with me, as I bring back today the words and sentiments of that blog post. Below is what I wrote five years ago. It is addressed to family caregivers for whom this blog was originally started. Yet I hope it is a blessing to others as well:
"My Mom passed into eternity a few days ago on Saturday, March 4. One might think this has nothing to do with family caregivers. Yet really all of life is about eternity. This life is merely a preparation for eternity. All the struggles the loved one for whom you are caring is enduring and all the struggles you also endure will be nothing when you begin experiencing the glories of Eternity some day. In that future day you will experience these glories which are beyond our ability to fully comprehend now, if you are the Lord's child. Therefore II Corinthians 4:18 reminds us to fix our eyes on the Lord and on what is yet unseen and not on the temporary and on what our eyes can see now.
Will you then indulge me, as I share a little of my experiences of these recent past days? As of Thursday I am home again in WI back from my trip to MN. I was physically and emotionally tired upon arriving home and still am in many ways. Yet my experiences while away from home though sad were also rich and sweet. Saturday morning, March 4, I was the only one of my siblings with my Mom at the moment. I had the privilege of talking to my Mom, singing songs to her, and reading Scripture to her. There was no outward response, but I believe she heard me. Very shortly after she passed into Glory. I marvel at God's timing in this in so many ways. I will always consider it a special gift.
Visitation night on the following Tuesday and the funeral day on Wednesday were also special moments. There were moments of weeping, shared hugs, and shared memories. We were also reminded not only of the fact that my Mom is with the Lord, but we were reminded of our shared precious faith and Godly heritage that we have in my family.
My Mom was a caregiver for my Dad for a few years in the same way as I was a caregiver for my husband, Wayne. We both had to rely on the Lord during those years. We both had to release our husbands to Eternity at a certain point. I lived five hundred miles away from my Mom; so I was not able to be directly involved with her care-giving in the same "hands-on" way, as I had for my husband. Yet I am thankful that I may have been her caregiver in those last moments of her life.
This is my Mom with two of my great nieces and great nephew.
Lord, how easily I get shaken. Criticism, challenges, changes and losses-all these things rattle me. Help me to live in the "kingdom that cannot be shaken" (Hebrews 12:28). Teach me how to build my life every day on Your Word and Your love, which will endure when all other things pass away.
Lord, I confess that I make an idol out of people's approval. Let me be so satisfied with Your love that I no longer respond to people out of fear of displeasing them but only in love, seeking what is best for them. Remove my idols of approval-which can never give me the approval I need.
Father, Your Son Jesus Christ gives me the meaning, value, and security I look for in other things. I ask that you help me to rejoice in Him more fully than I do. Break my schemes of earthly joy so I may find my all in Thee. Amen.
A couple of years ago I came across a Guideposts magazine that I had misplaced in a stack of books and magazines. In it was an article called "Grace, Gratitude, and Faith." The article told of Jeff Bjorck's walk of faith, as he cared for his mother with Alzheimer's disease. In this article Jeff lists four tips for caring for a loved one with Alzheimers. Below is the link to that article online. The only difference is that it has a different title than the print edition. I think you will find it to be a wonderful source of encouragement, if you are caring for a loved one. Just click on the link below:
Valentine's Day is considered a day for lovers to express their love for each other with cards, and perhaps candy, flowers, or jewelry. For some people, however, it can be a day of sadness because of past losses or current trials.
During those moments of sadness remember that the Lord loves you with an infinite love. He in effect is your Divine Valentine. He is sufficient. He alone can give you all that you need. People may fail you at times, but the Lord never will fail you.
Below is a poem called Your Divine Valentine. This poem became very special to me especially when I was a widow. I still love this poem. I especially love Jesus being referred as the Rose of Sharon in the Song of Solomon reference, because Sharon is my first name. (Be sure to check out this verse and all the verses for that matter.) Sharon is the name of a place and not the name of a person in the Bible, but I still love this verse. I hope you find the poem and accompanying Bible references a blessing.
When we face difficult moments, it may be easy to question God's purpose for our lives. Yet is there ever a time when God's purpose for our lives is not occurring? The short answer to that question is no. Ephesians 2:10 says, "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." In the verse before verse ten God tells us that we are saved by grace and faith alone and not because of anything we do. Once we are His child, however, He definitely has a purpose and plan for our lives even during the difficult and trying times.
When I look back on my life I can see that clearly, especially during certain periods in my life. I may not have seen it at the time, but I see it more clearly now. God had a purpose and plan for me as to when I was born and where I was born. He had a purpose in the schools I attended, and the parents I had. (Check out Acts 17:26 in the New Testament of the Bible.)
God also had a purpose in my coming to the town in which I now live to teach first grade in 1969 and to marry my first husband, Wayne, in 1971. He had a purpose in us raising three sons and then welcoming grandchildren. He also had a purpose in me being my first husband's caregiver for over four and a half years. Those were very difficult years, but it was God's purpose for me during those years. In fact, as difficult as those years proved to be, I remember having a sense of loss of purpose after Wayne died. Never doubt the value of what you do for your loved ones, dear caregiver!
Then came the eight plus years of widowhood in my life. These years although sometimes difficult too had purpose and value. They along with my care-giving years drew me closer into a sweet relationship with my Lord and helped me grow in so many ways. These years were also used by the Lord to tell God's story through my book and to my amazement a couple interviews. God used my previous care-giving experience further at the Gathering Place where I still volunteer. One experience builds upon another, and nothing is wasted in our lives. There always is a purpose. There always is a purpose even in the difficult times. So if you find yourself a widow especially after years of being a caregiver, know that your life still has vital purpose in God's economy.
Now I am remarried to Bob. This is not something I had anticipated earlier in my life. It is a relatively new phase in my life. As in any phase of life there are joys and blessings. There are also challenges. Life is never perfect. Yet in this phase of my life I also believe God is using me in ways for which I did not plan ahead of time. He has given me a purpose and placed situations in my life that I did not anticipate, so that I can be used of Him and learn to trust and rely on Him more and more.
Acts 17:27b-28 says, "He is not far from each one of us. For in Him we live and move and have our being.---" As children of God there is always purpose in our lives. That purpose is to glorify the Lord God where He has presently placed us in life. That purpose is to trust Him and glorify Him in the pleasant and difficult moments. How that fleshes out depends on our particular situations and circumstances at the time, but the purpose remains the same. Let's rest in God's will and purpose for us.
