Moving On or Moving Forward?

 

Does one move on, or do we or move forward to a larger life with and in the Lord after the death of a loved one?  Is the healthy path to grief healing mean we need to emotionally disconnect from the loved one who has passed, or is it or something else?  The answer is that for emotional healing to take place one has to gradually move forward in one's life.  This does not mean we deny that our loved one has died, because we will always hold on to them emotionally to some degree through our thoughts and memories.  We will also continue to  be ambushed by grief at times maybe even years later especially on special days like anniversaries and birthdays. 

 Further, our personalities and values are often formed by the people who came before us and influenced us.  God has sovereignly shaped us to be the people we are by the grandparents, parents, spouses, and circumstances that He has orchestrated in our lives. We become the people God has planned us to be and whom He is shaping us to be largely by the people He has allowed in our lives.  So treasure the memories and cherish the good values instilled.  They are a gift and part of whom we are.  

Helen Keller is quoted saying this, "What we  have once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us."  Our memories of them are also a continued connection with our loved ones while we are still on this earth and until we reunite with them in Eternity.  

Grief Letter

 

Dear Friends and Family,

I am part of a community grief share group, and it was suggested that we share a letter with our friends and family.  A few months ago I suffered the lost of my husband.  This was the second husband that the Lord has asked me to bury.  It will take me awhile to live with my loss once again, although one never completely gets over a  grief lost.  One just learns to live with it.  it becomes more manageable,  and it becomes part of who one is.  Grief is not a sign of weakness or lack of faith.  It is God's gift to me to help me process my emotions.   Please be patient with me especially when grief at times causes me to feel unfocused.   More than anything else I need your understanding and prayers.  You don't always have to know what to say, or even have to say anything.  Your touch,  hugs, and assurances of prayer for me are wonderful.  Pray for me that I can come to see meaning in my loss once again one day.   Thank you for caring for me and praying for me.  It is a wonderful gift to me for which I am thankful.

Blessings Even in the Struggles

I have a secret I am going to disclose.  I love Cinderella "happily ever after" type movies.  The truth is, however, that our "happily ever after" will not come until our Lord returns.  He is our only true Prince of Peace.

There are many moments of joy and happiness in this world.  There are also many trials and challenges.  God doesn't always let everything go our way or facilitate our version of "happily ever after" at least not during our existence on earth.  God is more interested in bringing us into a deeper relationship with Him and to a place of submission to His will.  He wants us to come to a place of trusting that His will is always best even in the struggles of life.  He wants us to rest in Him, to trust in Him.

Even in the struggles we can know that He loves us and cares about us, though our unreliable feelings may try to tell us differently.  He loves us even when He doesn't "fix" our difficult situations in the way we would like Him to remedy them. We must rely on the truths of Scripture which promise us over and over that He will never leave us.  God often uses the difficult chapters of our lives in ways that He doesn't use the smooth-sailing moments of our lives.  In the difficult moments it is also His chance to show His faithfulness over and over again,  Rest in His faithfulness, dear reader.

Below is a link to an interview with Laura Story.  Her husband and she, as his wife, have been dealing with the consequences of her husband's brain tumor for over a decade.  Her vision of "happily ever after" would have been for God to fix the situation.  That is not what happened.  Yet God has used this situation in her life for her good, to bring blessings.  God has also used the situation for His glory in wonderful ways-one being to encourage us. Click on the first link below to hear her story and insights.  You also may also want to check out her song "Blessings" by clicking on the second link below:

http://www.crosswalk.com/video/when-god-doesn-t-fix-your-life-an-interview-with-laura-story.html?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=fbpage&utm_campaign=cwupdate


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQan9L3yXjc

My Divine Valentine

 

This past Friday was Valentine's Day in the United States.  Valentine's Day is considered a day for lovers to express their love for each other with cards, and perhaps candy, flowers, or jewelry.  For some people, however, it can be a day of sadness because of past losses or current trials.

During those moments of sadness remember that the Lord loves you with an infinite love.  He in effect is your Divine Valentine.  He is sufficient.  He alone can give you all that you need.  People may fail you at times, but the Lord never will fail you.  

Below is a poem called Your Divine Valentine.  This poem became very special to me when I was a widow after Wayne died and is special again after the death of Bob.  I love this poem.  I especially love Jesus being referred as the Rose of Sharon in the Song of Solomon reference, because Sharon is my first name.  (Be sure to check out this verse and all the verses for that matter.)  Sharon is the name of a place and not the name of a person in the Bible, but I still love this verse.  I hope you find the poem and accompanying Bible references a blessing.    

Your Divine Valentine

A Valentine may play a love song for you, but God sings you the sweetest love song in the universe.  (Zephaniah 3:17)

A Valentine may give you flowers, but God sent you the most beautiful rose of all, Jesus.
(Song of Solomon 2:1)

A Valentine may bring you chocolate, but God provides you with something even sweeter, His Word.  (Psalm 119:103)

A Valentine may love you for a lifetime, but God loved you before you were born and will love you for all eternity,
(Jeremiah 31:3)

frida

God's Direction and Guidance

Scripture often talks about the Lord being sovereign and about Him directing our steps.    We are told that God's Word  is a lamp or light for our life's path.   Scripture also teaches us that the fountain of life is found in God and that in His light we see light. (Psalm 36:9  Proverbs 20:24. and Psalm 119:105).  I don't know about you, however, but I often find myself anxiously fretting and planning my next step instead of trusting in and resting in the sovereignty of God not only in my head but also deep down in my heart.

Recently God's directing my path came into sharp focus.  I had planned on being somewhere that morning,  It was a good place to be, but God seemed to have other things in mind for me that day.  I woke up with an unpleasant sick headache.  I then began to question whether I should leave the house that morning.  It also had snowed a bit over night just enough to make it slippery on the roads and sidewalks.  Finally, I received a computer borne message that morning from someone who needed my prayers and encouragement.  I felt that the Lord had directed my steps that morning to stay home by sovereignly directing circumstances for me to do so.

The Lord laid this on my heart in another way recently  For some time I have been fretting and overthinking a situation sometimes even in the middle of the night.  Very recently the Lord has shown me some new information which makes me realize that all the fretting had accomplished nothing but to make me tired and anxious.  God is in control.  He is sovereign and directing my steps.  Thank You, Lord!  Forgive me when I fret, worry, and over plan.  

A few days ago I posted a song about God's sovereignty on Facebook.  I have a link to that song on this post today also.  Let's rejoice in God's sovereignty and guidance in our lives.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4x8TZiwPGa0

Jesus, the Greater Adam

 

I don't know about you, but I sometimes weary of how the world is right now with the many heartaches and trials.  God created the physical world with beauty and perfection.  He also created the first people, Adam and Eve, sinless, perfect, and good.  God did create them with free will, however, and they chose to sin and disobey God.  They were in a perfect and beautiful environment in the Garden of Eden where God placed them.  Yet they failed to obey God in the one act of obedience that God asked of then.  They succumbed to the devil's temptation.  Thus sin with its consequences entered the world.

Yet praise God that there is still hope, peace, and joy for the child of God.  The first Adam failed, but Jesus, who is sometimes called the second Adam, and is our Great High Priest came to this earth to again give us hope.  He left a perfect place in heaven with the Father and came to this very flawed world.

Jesus lived a perfectly sinless life for us  in spite of the devil tempting Him in the very hostile and imperfect environment of the wilderness.  Then Jesus died the awful death of death on the cross.  He did this to pay the punishment for our sins.  Finally, He rose again from death to win victory over death.  Hence, we will one day be with Him forever free from all heartache, tears, and trials.  We will be living  in perfect peace and joy with the Lord forever.  Hence, those who are children of God and seeking to obey Him are filled with His hope because of our glorious promised future.

Even though we still live in a sin laced and troubled world. we already are able to enjoy a sweet relationship with our Lord.  We can know that the Lord will always be faithful to us and guide us throughout all our life on this earth.  We can know that we have a Savior who can perfectly sympathize with our weaknesses and our heartaches.  We can go to the Lord with all our needs and rest in Him    Trying to forge ahead in our own perceived abilities will never work, but in the measure that we can rest in the Lord we will experience peace, hope, and strength.  Rejoice and rest in  Him and in the promises of His Word, child of God!

 

Thank You, Lord

 

Thank You, Lord, for the lessons taught by grief and other trials.  Thank You, Lord, that You use suffering to help me grow spiritually and emotionally.  Thank You,  Lord, that grief and other trials teaches me that I am not in control of anything; but You, Lord, are in control of everything-that You are sovereign and are God!  Thank You, Lord, that even in the very difficult things which I have experienced in my life such as breast cancer and the decline and deaths of my parents and my two husbands, Your sovereign plan for my life was still in place.  Thank You, Lord, that even in more recent household and car issues You are in your control.  Thank You, Lord, for being with me each step of the way and for what You taught me and are continuing to teach me through every difficult experience.

Thank You, Lord, that Your wisdom is beyond my understanding.  Thank You, Lord, that You are a loving and caring God.  Thank You, Lord, that I can trust You.  Thank You. Lord, that You use suffering for my ultimate good; so I become more like You, Jesus, in my actions and attitudes and become the person You intend me to be.  Thank You, Lord, for Your hope and joy.

Lord, instead of me asking, "Why did you allow this to happen?' type questions; help me to ask, "How  can I grow and honor You through this experience?" type questions.   Lord, grant me patience, as I wait on Your perfect timing for healing.  Thank  You, Lord, for the peace and healing I will and do find only in You.  Help me, Lord, to remember that this world is only temporal, and help me to not try to distract myself with mere busyness or meaningless pursuits but to rather rest in You and shine for You.

Thank You, Lord, that in my eternal home there will be no more instability, fear, or sadness.  Thank You, Lord, that in Eternity I will never stop learning more and more about the wonders of Your character.  Thank You, Lord that it is You who will make Eternity wonderful, but also thank You that I will  be reunited with loved ones as well  Thank You, Lord, that I  can experience hope. peace, and joy because of what lies ahead in Eternity!